Fic: Through the Years (part 1)

[mini_fest_mod]

Title: Through The Years
Author: ???
Rating: R
Characters: Padma Patil/Millicent Bulstrode
Prompt: #71 Femslash, pleaseeeeeee.
I'm not even picky on the couple, I'd just like to see two women enjoying their first (or second or twentieth or fiftieth, you get the idea) Christmas or Yule together, by dexstarr
Warnings: None
Summary: The events of one short night change Padma’s life forever.
Word Count: ~13K
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended.
A/N: First of all a big massive spanking thank you to C for helping me pick the pairing for this and for the cheerleading, it was great fun writing this and without you I would never have had the opportunity to do this and I’m so incredibly glad I did! *squishes* Also thank you and hugs and kisses and flowers and shiny things to her and G. I hope you both know that I love you something fiercely and that I mostly wrote this fic for both of you! <3 Thank you also to E (I love you) for an additional beta to those of C and G who did a super fantastic job, who told me if things I wanted to do didn’t work and have been nothing but supportive and brilliant! Thank you also for letting me run stuff past you when I couldn’t figure it out by myself. Thank you to K for the handholding, you are wonderful and I fucking adore you! Another thank you goes to V for looking at something with new eyes and telling me whether it worked. You’ve all been wonderful and I appreciate you more than I can express in words.
A big shout-out of eternal gratitude and love goes out to alisanne for writing a fic that made me see Millicent in a new light and appreciate her as a character. Without you, my darling and your awesomeness and love, this would never have happened. Thank you!
Thanks to dexstarr for the prompt, I hope this fic is somewhat along the lines of what you were hoping for. I was really happy to see a femme!slash prompt out there and had to do it. :)
Thank you to the mods for their patience and for making this awesome fest available. ♥ I wasn’t even going to take part in any seasonal fests and then you made it all special and shiny for me! ♥
And to everyone else, this is my first attempt at femme!slash, I’ve been wanting to write some for a while and with C’s first inspiration I found I enjoyed it quite immensely. Thanks for having me!
Acknowledgements: The stanza at the beginning of the fic is a direct quote from that brilliant Christmas song “Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas” I was thinking of either the version by Mel Torme or the one by Tori Amos; thank you to my entire f-list for their input on what the bloody hell one does in a coffee shop when waiting for somebody; and on top of everything, there’s a line in this fic I shamelessly stole from that beautiful 2006 adaption of Jane Eyre, staring Toby Stephens and Ruth Wilson, also, that second to last scene was totally inspired by it as well.


Through the years

Through the years
We all will be together,
If the Fates allow
Hang a shining star upon the highest bough.
And have yourself a merry little Christmas now.


It took her longer than she had anticipated to find an empty seat in her favourite coffee shop in Diagon Alley. “Top of the Muffin” was always crowded around this time of day, especially shortly after the Christmas holidays when everyone was busy exchanging and returning unwanted Christmas gifts. She herself had returned a bright orange vase which sang rude chanteys, whenever someone came near, that her sister had gifted her. It had probably been revenge for Padma gifting her a talking Oliver Wood doll. Twice. With accessories.
Even now she couldn’t hold back a grin as she thought about the look on Parvati’s face as she’d unwrapped the second one. Padma would never understand what Parvati saw in those sporty types; she preferred her partners to actually have more than two brain cells put together. Then again this very preference might have been why she was placed in Ravenclaw and not in Gryffindor like her sister. On top of having a thing for stupid-yet-built guys, Parvati had a talent for falling for emotional fuckwits. If she thought a guy was hot, he was usually a complete tosser. Had Parvati been able to utilise this talent, she probably would have become a very rich woman by now, saving women like her from their inevitable fate of being subjected to emotional fuckwittage.

Padma took a sip from her coffee and barely managed to refrain from moaning aloud as the first tendrils of its bitter flavoured exploded on her tongue. Merlin but she lived for coffee from this place; it was magical, without being magical at all. So the inside of the café was larger than it should have been, the cups never cooled unless you wanted them to, but the coffee itself was still all Muggle and somehow that made it all the better. She carefully put her cup back down and cut off part of her cupcake. Padma let it dissolve slowly on her tongue. The flavour was that of dark chocolate with oranges and then a tinge of chili pepper. The Towanda Cupcake had been her favourite for years and the year they had discontinued it for a while she had almost wept so upset had she been.

Content with listening to the bustle around her, Padma leaned back in her chair and indulged in some people watching, as they rushed by outside. She knew she wouldn’t have to wait long, she never did.

~.o.O.0.O.o.~

Padma still remembered the first time she noticed her. It was not the first time she had seen her, not by a long shot. At Hogwarts you saw everyone, even the people who tried to be invisible.
The French boy Padma was with after abandoning her partner at the Yule Ball had led her into the gardens. Everything around them was lit by fairy lights and under different circumstances she would have been sure to describe the atmosphere as romantic. The boy pushed her hair back and began kissing her neck as he let his hand wander along her waist and up to her breasts; she hadn’t even bothered to learn his name. She stopped his hand, before it could reach his goal, but he wasn’t easily derailed touching first her belly and thighs, causing her to clamp them together as if her knees were magnetic. She had no idea what she was doing here with this boy she didn’t care about and right then. She started to question the wisdom of giving her consent to go out here with this rather persistent specimen of the male persuasion.

And that’s when Padma had noticed her. Not too far away from them stood a Slytherin girl entwined in a heated embrace with someone much smaller and slimmer than her. She thought it odd that any man would choose a woman twice his size. It was only when the Slytherin girl lifted her companion up and placed her on a pillar so they were on eye level that Padma saw the person the girl had been entwined with so intimately only moments before was another girl. Seeing those big hands hold onto the girl's slender hips, rubbing gentle circles, then tracing upwards, touching her waist and then tangling in the girl’s dark hair to draw her into a kiss made something hot coil deep down in Padma.

Her mouth fell open and it wasn’t in shock; as she watched, the insistent boy kept trying to feel her up. She could almost pretend that it was the big girl running her hands all over her body and once that image had taken hold of her mind, she couldn’t suppress a moan. Encouraged, the boy became more frantic in his ministrations, trying to pull her into a kiss, but she pulled her face away, she needed to be able to see. Everything she was doing and letting the boy do to her was wrong, but at the same time, if she stopped him now, she wouldn’t be able to look at the Slytherin girl.

When the boy forced his hand between her thighs, she couldn’t stand it any longer. She pushed him away, not caring about the sputtering and the angry French words that were thrown at her. Padma’s gaze was still riveted by the couple she had been watching the entire time. They broke apart at the ruckus, the girl on the pedestal looking shocked and ashamed and the girl that had so enchanted Padma flashing Padma a knowing grin and a wink before taking the other girl’s hand, helping her to climb down and then leading her back into the castle.

Padma had no idea what had just happened or how the other girl seemed to have known what had been going on inside her head, she just stood there, staring at the spot where only a moment ago the two girls had stood. When the French boy reached for her again, whispering enticing words into her ear as he pressed himself against her back, she stepped away. This definitely wasn’t what she wanted, she was sure of it. She would have to sit down and think long and hard about what had just happened. When he tried to grab her breasts again, she spun around and slapped him.

“Piss off, will you?” She hissed, the crude words feeling good on her tongue, before stalking back into the castle, heading straight for Ravenclaw tower, not caring about the mess she had left behind.

~.o.O.0.O.o.~

Padma didn’t know it at the time, but that one moment in the charmed gardens of Hogwarts had changed everything. What she had found out about herself in that moment had explained so much and to this day she couldn’t find it in herself to regret anything about it. Her cupcake had been finished a while ago and she was still waiting. Time seemed to pass slower than was possible according to the natural order of things but waiting did that to everyone. She got out the most recent copy of The Quibbler she had purchased earlier and began to read.

Dean Thomas was opening his own art gallery after New Year’s and had been interviewed by Luna Lovegood. Padma skipped most of the questions relating to Wrackspurts and Nargles, whether they were real or not didn’t matter to her. Lovegood had never been mean to her, only once patted her arm and said “don’t worry, you are not alone!” in a dreamy voice and then wandered off, her radish earrings dangling wildly from side to side with every step. At the time Padma had not known what it meant, however the meaning had become clearer much later. Sometimes Padma wondered whether the creatures Lovegood claimed to see were in fact real, because she seemed to be able to perceive things about people before they themselves even knew of them.

~.o.O.0.O.o.~

The next time Padma saw the girl for any longer amount of time was in the hospital wing. The entire school must have been through it that winter with Dragon Pox being the culprit and finally it was her turn. She was upset, because she’d studied so hard for her exams and now she was too sick to take them. Padma didn’t receive many visitors, she’d never been very outgoing and was fine with that. The last real adventure she’d allowed herself had forced her to hide from the advances of a boy until finally he’d found some other prey weeks later.

No, adventures weren’t her thing, she decided as she lay under the white crisp sheets. She could hear Madame Pomfrey bustling around in the background, and was actually happy to be left forgotten. Her fever had gone down significantly and while she was allowed to receive visitors. Parvati had shown up that morning, but Padma could tell that it was more out of a sense of obligation than anything else. The fact that she had brought Lavender Brown and the two of them had constantly talked about some insignificant stuff that Padma couldn’t even pretend to care about told her that much.

Tranquillity washed over her and Padma smiled as she looked up at the ceiling high above her. There was nothing to it, she decided, she would have to stay here until she was well again and while she was away from the bustle in Ravenclaw Tower, she might as well enjoy it. She didn’t know who else was on the ward with her, but since she was one of the last to fall ill, there weren’t many people left. Her bed was curtained off on both sides, which meant unless something happened, she probably wouldn’t find out until the other occupants or she herself were released.

For once, the sky was clear outside and warm rays of winter sun fell into her pillow. She smiled as she relished the warmth. Her peace was disturbed when the occupant of the bed beside her started coughing in a way that sounded like choking. Madame Pomfrey’s steps could be heard as she hurried over to the bed.

“There you go, dear,” Padma heard her say and then all was quiet again. The illness had tired her and she felt herself drifting off to sleep, when the doors to the hospital wing flew open with a bang. Madame Pomfrey must have got startled, because she dropped something on the other side of the curtain. She never went back to clean it up, but instead hurried over to the student that was just being carried in. Padma became curious, if Madame Pomfrey neglected to keep her hospital wing clean, something must have been the matter. She raised herself up on her elbows and tried make out what was going on.

A Hufflepuff, according to the house colours displayed in his uniform, was rushed by the small square of the hospital wing she was able to survey from her position. His face was covered in soot and part of uniform was charred. The boy’s hands looked terribly raw and red and the stench of burned skin and hair almost made her gag. Probably double potions, a cynical voice commented at the back of her head, surprising her. She was supposed to be the nice, smart quiet girl and yet. Padma didn’t feel guilty; yes of course it was terrible that the boy had got hurt, but if they’d simply offer a special class with less volatile potions for Hufflepuffs accidents like this wouldn’t happen.
Where was all of this house prejudice suddenly coming from, she wondered. She never used to be like this. If Padma was honest with herself, she knew exactly where it came from. She had figured out that the girl she had watched in the garden that night, which now seemed so long ago, had been with a Hufflepuff girl. She was jealous, she realised. Padma had thought about what she had witnessed very often, she had even fantasised about being on the receiving end of those hot kisses. Just thinking about it now made her have to suppress a whimper.

The memory usually assaulted her during the most inopportune moments and it was then that she was glad she was a girl, because her arousal was much more private and usually only showed in a light blush tainting her cheeks. The same blush she felt heating her features now. If anyone saw her, they would probably put it down to her fever.

Padma was startled out of her reverie when the curtain beside her bed was suddenly roughly pulled aside.

“Sorry, my dear. I hope it’s all right if Miss Bulstrode stays in here with you for a bit.” Madame Pomfrey said. It was her, Padma realised. The girl, Madame Pomfrey was pushing into her curtained off area was the same girl she had just fantasised about. For a minute her throat closed in terror.

“I… no… yeah, it’s all right. I don’t mind.” She finally managed to say.

“That’s the spirit. Thank you, dear! Will you two be all right, or do you need anything else?”

“Uhm… no, I don’t think so. Thank you, Madame Pomfrey.” Padma replied, still not daring to look over at the sleeping girl in the bed next to hers. Miss Bulstrode was close enough for Padma to touch, she realised. How tempting it was to just reach over terrified her.

Madame Pomfrey nodded at her once more before closing the curtain again. The sounds coming from the other side suggested that they were setting up a bed for the Hufflepuff boy. Padma slid deeper under her covers, pulling them up to her chin and holding them there tightly, like a frightened child would. She stared at the ceiling again, all her tranquillity shattered and her heart racing. Her focus narrowed on her immediate surroundings. The only things she could hear were the frantic beating in her chest and the slow calm breaths coming from the other occupant of the small space. Padma thought about lying on her side and watching the other girl, but when she attempted to do so, the girl shifted and Padma became too terrified to move.

Padma let her mind wander, recalling other times she had seen the Slytherin girl around. Wherever she went people seemed to scowl at her or fear her, but the girl didn’t even seem to notice. Miss Bulstrode as Madame Pomfrey had called her, walked through Hogwarts with a confidence that girls like Padma could only admire, but never achieve. Bulstrode was a large girl, with strong shoulders and arms and somehow it was exactly that and her confidence that drew Padma in. The girl knew exactly who she was and what she wanted or at least left the impression that she did and if that wasn’t the hottest thing Padma had ever seen, she didn’t know what was.

Clenching the sheets between her sheets and keeping her eyes shut while pretending to be asleep wasn’t working and the fact that Padma’s imagination chose to conjure up images of the girl next to her in the soft light of the castle gardens, how her hands had cupped and caressed that Hufflepuff girl’s breasts and how their lips had slid hotly against each other. This wasn’t happening, it couldn’t be! It was only her body flooding her brain with oxytocins and it shouldn’t influence her like it did. She was a rational creature, in control of her environment, but for some reason the rules didn’t apply to the girl, which had so recently invaded her fantasies and dreams.

She must have dosed off without noticing because the next time Padma woke, the soft light of the bedside lamp shone into her face. Even in her sleep her body had betrayed her feelings and had turned towards the girl that now constantly occupied her mind. Padma knew the girl was awake, but she didn’t dare open her eyes. When she could bear it no longer, Padma pretended to slowly wake up, fluttering her eyelids and with each flutter getting a better look at the girl calmly sitting and reading in the bed next to hers.

The girl wasn’t beautiful, not in a conventional sense, but the way she moved, every slow motion of the hand as she turned a page, now overlain with the memories of that night in the garden, made her seem graceful. The girl’s fingers were long and straight, holding on to the book almost tenderly. Her hair was almost as dark as her own and to Padma’s utter surprise the girl was wearing glasses. Padma couldn’t seem to look her fill, she knew the longer she stared the higher the risk of being caught, but to see the girl so unguarded, her features softened by the light of the lamp, it was a sight Padma couldn’t resist. There was something about her, some inner strength that Padma was lacking, and she felt herself drawn to it like a moth to the flame.

Just like a moth isn’t aware of the peril that lurks, Padma noticed too late that she had been caught staring. The other girl was looking at her, eyeing her down the bridge of her nose, over the rim of her book as if to say “what the hell are you looking at?” Padma found herself turning bright red, which only got worse when the girl inclined her head slightly towards her and raised an eyebrow. Padma got the message and mumbling an apology turned away, her back now to the light. Padma stared at the shadow the girl cast onto the curtain. It took longer than she had anticipated before the girl took up her book again and continued reading. A tiny part of her hoped that the girl had been looking at her, studying her, just like Padma had studied her earlier.

Padma didn’t know why this girl got under her skin the way she did, but there was no denying it. She should be able to be rational about it, but no amount of thinking could slow the pace of her racing heart. It was harder to fall asleep this time; Padma didn’t dare move in fear of drawing attention to herself again. After what seemed like an eternity the lamp was turned off. Padma slowly turned onto her back, staring out the brighter squares of windows that were filled with what seemed like all the stars in the universe. She knew this wasn’t true, but again, rational thought and her heart’s perception of reality were two different things. She longed to reach over and hold the girl’s hand and look at the stars with her. While Padma didn’t dare to even look at the girl again, she could pretend. So she lay there imagining what the girl’s hand would feel like in hers, what they would talk about and laugh about as they made up their own constellations. It was only when the moon moved into her field of vision that reality intruded on her thoughts.

Would the girl like that, she wondered? Would she want to do something so whimsical and of so little consequence? What Padma had seen of her indicated that the girl she was projecting all her longing on was as down to earth as she was and wasn’t interested in this kind of romantic shmoop and still she couldn’t help herself. In her fantasies, the girl smiled at her, not only that cheeky possessive smile Padma had seen her bestow upon her girlfriend, but rather a dreamy loving one that the rational part of her brain referred to as “sickly sweet”. Padma wasn’t kidding herself, the part of her that got her sorted into Ravenclaw wasn’t in control any longer, it hadn’t truly been, since she had really noticed the Slytherin girl for the first time and most importantly, the girl had noticed her.

No matter where Padma saw her, tried to observe the girl out of the shadows without drawing attention to herself, the girl would always find her, look back at her, as if challenging her. Challenging her to do what, Padma didn’t even dare imagine.
What was wrong with her? She didn’t even know Miss Bulstrode’s given name and she was already fantasising about what a relationship with her would be like. Trying to figure out why she had such an influence over Padma, she turned her head to look at the girl and found her looking right back. There was no mirth reflected in those eyes and Padma was glad of it. What it felt like to hold the other girl’s gaze defied definition. It wasn’t frightening or strange, it just was. She hesitantly moved her hand towards the girl, underneath her covers until she held tightly to the metal frame on that side of her bed. Padma already knew she wouldn’t dare to reach out, but when the girl’s gaze flickered down quickly to her hand and then back to her face, Padma knew she hadn’t done wrong. The sound of the girl extending her own hand and clinging to the metal was like music in her ears. While the darkness separating the two of them seemed vast, she knew that in reality it was close enough to make her shiver in anticipation. Padma fell asleep still holding onto the railing, pretending she was holding the girl’s hand instead.

*****************

“But Millie, you promised!” A voice whined, waking Padma. She felt groggy and warm.

“Oh be quiet, Bridget! You are getting on my nerves!” This was the first time Padma was close enough to really hear the girl’s voice. It was darker than she had anticipated, but still nice and the sound of it let shivers run down her spine. Her name was Millie. Millie, she repeated inside her head, it was oddly fitting Padma thought, although ironically more to the fairy-tale version of the girl that she had come up with rather than with what she had actually seen of her. Padma wondered whether Millie was short for something, maybe Mildred or Milena Bulstrode, which of course would be much more fitting and less romantic. Padma found, she didn’t mind the sound of “Millie” at all. Padma tried to stay still to be able to listen in on more of their conversation, but something about her must have changed, maybe it was her breathing that gave her away, because the next thing she heard wasn’t what she wanted to hear at all.

“Now you’ve gone and woken her up with all your whining. And bloody well stop pouting, Bridget. I don’t give a fuck about that pout of yours, no matter how cute you may think it is.” Millie sounded really annoyed, even to Padma’s ears.

Despite her better judgement Padma slowly turned over, only to see the girl called Bridget brush her pouty lips against Millie’s. She could barely hear the whispered “Oh, but you love it.” Before she pressed her eyes shut. Padma couldn’t do this, not again. Padma turned her head away, cursing and welcoming the glaring brightness of a new day at the same time. Tears of jealous rage burned beneath her eyelids. The last thing she needed was to start crying now, because of something she so desperately wanted but could never have.

Last night must have been a dream, just a foolish cruel dream. She bunched her hands to fists and forced herself to calm down. The sound of kissing was still too loud in the room and when it finally stopped she couldn’t help but release a sigh of relief.

“What’s her problem?” Bridget asked, clearly talking about Padma.

“I imagine the same one I’m having. Namely, you, my darling! You are infuriatingly annoying.”

“That’s never stopped you before.” Bridget said chuckling.

The wet sound of kissing returned, but was quickly interrupted when slapping sound of slippers on stone quickly closed in on their small room. Padma could hear Bridget being shoved off the bed and then what could only be a smack to her backside.

“Now be off with you, cheeky minx! I’ll help you with your Herbology homework later. I think they’re going to release me later today. See you in the common room and save me some of that dessert, you know the one.”

Bridget walked out of the confined space and left nothing but awkward silence between Padma and Millie behind that seemed to stretch on forever. Padma felt like hugging Madame Pomfrey when she finally showed up and gave both of them their potions. She took their temperature and told them both to rest. Millie picked up her book again and Padma pretended to sleep. She was angry. Angry at herself, angry at Millie, furious at Bridget, or whatever that bitch’s name was, because she had what Padma so desperately craved. How they could both be so confident, so open about something so private she would never understand. This thing sparked by the moment Padma had had with Millie the night before, that had let her get her hopes up was letting her down. What she had just witnessed, and the fact that she couldn’t even make herself speak to Millie made sure that whatever “this” might have one day become was all over before it had even begun.

During the day Padma began feeling more and more exhausted and if she was any judge of it, her temperature continued to rise. She couldn’t tell whether it was another dream brought on by a fever, but once she could have sworn felt the cold brush of a hand against her forehead, another one holding her hand. “Shhh, it’ll be okay. I promise,” a voice said and as quickly as they had come, the hands were gone.

It took two days for the fever to break and by then both the Hufflepuff boy in the next compartment and Millie had been released. It was back to tranquillity for Padma and if she had been less rational, she would have listened to her heart and called it loneliness.

~.o.O.0.O.o.~

Padma ordered another drink, after casting a quick Tempus. Millie was late. Her girlfriend wasn’t usually late, something must have come up. Padma wasn’t worried, not really. Prejudices and hatred still ran hot sometimes, but Millie could absolutely take care of herself. She shifted in her chair, crossing her legs and turning slightly so she could see the door to the shop more clearly. When her coffee arrived she carefully blew on it, inhaling the tendrils of steam carrying the delicious dark and bitter flavour she so adored. Padma dropped a spoonful of sugar into it, stirring it carefully. The swirl of the coffee after Padma removed the spoon was hypnotic. The Quibbler lay forgotten beside her and it was a while before she took it up again to continue reading.

The article on Dean Thomas was followed by an in depth discussion of the new edition of Hogwarts": A History, partially rewritten to include the most recent destruction and rebuilding attempts after You-Know-Who’s demise. It had caused quite a bit of controversy, because in her attempt to re-integrate Slytherin house after the war, Hermione Granger had edited part of the older book as well. She had chosen to show that not all dark wizards came from Slytherin, that typecasting and lack of inter-house unity had been to blame for most of the things that went wrong. Padma thought it sounded like Granger was trying to make peace with her past, work through some of the issues that had arisen after the war was over. Setting history straight wasn’t Padma’s way to make amends for chances missed. She lived every day in a manner that was akin to a miniature peace process in the making and she loved every minute of it. It hadn’t always been that straightforward to her, but then, things involving matters of the heart never were, no matter how much she tried to rationalise them. The heart wanted what the heart wanted, there was nothing else to it.

~.o.O.0.O.o.~

Padma was scared. Being in Hogwarts under Headmistress Dolores Umbridge was like nothing she had experienced before. While her and her sister didn’t really have that much in common, she was glad Parvati had asked her to be part of Dumbledore’s Army. This at least meant that she now knew how to defend herself and how to cast a Patronus should she need help. The worst part about this entire year though was having to sneak back to Ravenclaw Tower in the middle of the night after practise. Not only did she have to avoid school prefects, Peeves and Mr. Filch, she also had to take care to avoid Headmistress Umbridge’s by now notorious Inquisitorial Squad. Padma had seen the scars on the back of the hands of those that had been caught doing things now outlawed by the new headmistress and she had no intention of joining their ranks.

She tread carefully, straining her ears as she walked along the corridor. She would make it, she decided; she was almost there. All was quiet when she turned the last corner and then erupted into chaos as the entire Inquisitorial Squad went for her. She took to her heels, running as fast as they would carry her, but was tripped almost right away by a hex shot at her. She twisted her ankle when she fell and it hurt like hell. She wouldn’t cry in front of them, she promised herself, but when they gathered around her, laughing and kicking, she couldn’t hold back the tears. She didn’t even hear what they were saying; she only curled up in a ball.

This was not what Padma had been practising for. She had been practising not to be a victim but to defend herself and yet here she was. She raised her head to see why the kicking and shouting had stopped; the way she knew these people, this couldn’t mean anything good. Her gaze fell immediately on the face that haunted most of her dreams. Millie. She stood there, laughing and sneering with the others and somehow the fact that Padma felt like she knew her made it all the more terrifying. Padma pressed her eyes shut in a vain attempt to block out the image. She was pulled to her feet by strong hands and then held stills in a grip so tight she was unable to break free.

“Well, well, what have we here, a little know-it-all out after curfew? Don’t you know it’s dangerous for Little Red Riding Hood to be out in the forest by herself?” Those hands held Padma in a way that she really didn’t like. It reminded her of that boy in the garden. As those hands wandered lower, she got really scared and began struggling. She knew it was useless but she wouldn’t give in, not to this, never to this.

“Greg, you fucking wanker, go and get your Muggle blow up doll, it’s not like you would know what to do with her anyway!” Millie! It was Millie! Padma’s eyes flew open and she stared at the girl who had just come to her rescue.

“Oh right, and you do know? I suppose she’s just your type, isn’t she?”

Nobody was more startled than Padma when Millie’s fist connected with Gregory Goyle’s jaw, felling him instantly. His arms grew limp around her and still he dragged her to the floor with him. She scrambled away from him, shuddering at the sight he made, his hair sprawled over the floor, a thick bruise immediately beginning to blossom on his chin and his eyes rolled back in his head so only the whites showed through the half opened lids. Padma tried to get up and run away, but she was caught by the back of her robes and pulled back into the circle of sneering faces. Millie was looking down at her. Padma had never noticed just how tall she was until now. When Millie spoke, she didn’t look at Padma, but rather at everyone else.

“Now, I’m going to take this one and teach her a lesson about sneaking around after curfew. Any questions?”

When there was no reply, Padma was dragged away. Millie walked so fast that Padma had trouble keeping up and would have fallen more than once if Millie’s grip on her robes hadn’t been so strong. They eventually stopped outside of an empty abandoned classroom and Millie surprised Padma again by making quick work of the door and pushing her inside. Padma stumbled and clung to an old overturned desk to pull herself upright. She didn’t know what to expect. And she was too afraid to turn around and face Millie.

Millie’s strong hands heavily settled on her shoulders and slowly turned her around. Padma’s heart was racing as she let herself be walked backwards, her gaze cast down submissively, until her back connected with cold rough stones of the classroom wall. She didn’t know what would happen, she wanted to look up and see into Millie’s eyes, find out what she had planned for her, but fear had its fist tightly wrapped around her heart and like a frightened animal, she started trembling. She couldn’t even raise her eyes and Padma was ashamed that all she could do was let things happen to her. She was weak and she hated it. Tears of rage and humiliation sprang from her eyes and ran down her cheeks.

Millie pulled her chin up, forcing Padma to meet her gaze. Padma thought she knew what was coming and closed her eyes in defeat. She couldn’t bear it. When warm hands cradled her face, both thumbs gently stroking her cheeks, she thought she must be dreaming again. Just the ghost of a kiss brushed against her lips. Padma almost cried out with months of suppressed love. She had trouble getting air into her lungs and her heart beat away in her chest as if it was trying to escape its cage. As if her reaction had been the answer to an unasked question, those wonderful lips were back, kissing her for all she was worth. She gasped and sobbed as she let Millie kiss her and when Millie’s tongue traced her lower lip she opened up obediently, allowing her to plunder her mouth at will.

Padma couldn’t remember when she had wrapped her arms around Millie and pulled her close, but they were flush against each other, both panting into each other’s mouths and it was perfect. Padma pressed her face into the cradle of Millie’s neck, just inhaling her scent and holding her close. Millie was holding her tightly, gently stroking her neck and whispering into the crown of her head.

“I know you’ve been watching me, Patil, ever since that time you caught me and Bridget in the garden. I knew you were watching me. Did you know I was watching you then too? Did you know I’ve been watching you since?” Padma had never heard Millie’s voice sound that soft and seductive and she had paid attention to pretty much everything Millie did these days. This voice washed over her and made her shiver. She could feel her nipples tighten at the sound of it.

Millie let go of her and held her at arm’s length when Padma tried to move in again. Millie looked at her and she had never felt this exposed and vulnerable in front of anyone before.

“What…?”

“Be quiet, Patil!” Usually Padma would have taken offence at the town of voice she was spoken to but there was something dark in it, something powerful and she couldn’t help but obey.

“Why have you been watching me? Is it because you want me to do this to you?” With that she leaned in and kissed Padma roughly on the lips once more, moving immediately away again when Padma tried to lean in and deepen the kiss, her entire being screaming yes.

“Or is it because you saw me do this?” Millie came closer again and ran her hands up Padma’s thighs and waist. Padma shivered under her ministrations and couldn’t help the quiet moan that escaped her.

“I still think there’s more about it. I don’t think it’s only the things you want me to do to you, is it?” Millie said. She was right, but Padma couldn’t find the words. Her body moved forward of her own accord and Millie chuckled darkly.

“I thought so.”

This time, when she came close, she stayed. She ran her fingers along Padma’s neck, causing goose bumps to rise on her skin. He hands were shaking as she reached for Millie, unbelieving of her own bravery as they found Millie’s waist and tucked her closer, beginning to roam over her back and hip. Millie finally brought their lips back together. She was in charge. Padma didn’t mind. She didn’t mind how terrifying it was to feel herself spin so completely out of control. Padma didn’t even mind the small embarrassing noises she couldn’t seem to stop herself from making.

Much too soon, Millie pulled away. She allowed Padma’s hands to rest on her waist, but held her index and middle finger against Padma’s lips when she tried to object.

“I don’t kiss and tell and from what I know of you Patil, neither do you.”

Millie stepped back from her and Padma felt instantly cold. What would happen to her now? She didn’t know. Millie took her hand and pulled Padma off the wall and flush against her, her arm was slung around Padma’s middle. She leaned in and Padma could smell her breath as Millie whispered against her lips. “Now let’s get you back to your common room, alright?”

Before Padma could reply, Millie had pulled her out of the classroom and into the corridor they had taken earlier, She let Millie lead the way. Even though she was more confused than she had ever been in her entire life, Padma had no trouble keeping up this time. It was as if her feet were so eager to carry her closer to the girl in front of her that they would have taken her any distance in the entire universe to get there.

In front of the Ravenclaw Tower, Millie kissed her once more, not tenderly, like she had at first, but hot and possessive. Millie leaned forward and Padma could hear her inhaling deeply. “You smell absolutely divine Patil, did you know that?” She asked and then she was gone.
Padma’s fingers brushed against her own lips as if trying to feel Millie’s still on them and her whispered. “Don’t call me Patil.” Went unheard.

~.o.O.0.O.o.~

Go to Part 2